Kim Baird, Nathan Messer, and Tahoe [Christmas 2004]
Yesterday afternoon I had the ultimate privilege of being able to hold my dear friend's hand while she died. Kim Baird passed away yesterday at 3:22 in the afternoon. Her boyfriend Nathan, cousin and best friend Shannon, and I were there holding her hands while her dog Tahoe laid at her feet. We told her we love her, that we didn't want her gone, but to feel free to go whenever she was ready. We told stories about Kim to eachother while we watched our friend draw her last breaths, and then her breathing just stopped, peacefully. There is no way that death can ever feel right when it's one so young, when it's one of your own loved ones, but her passing felt just right to us. It was time, it was how she wanted it, and we all felt so lucky to have been there to help her move on to what's next.
I can't believe that in such a short time, she's just gone. My friend is gone. I've known from the day I met her that we would loose her this way, and for the last year and a half, we've been grateful for every day we had with her. But now she's gone, and while Kim filled up such a small physical space in the world while she was here, the void she leaves behind is enormous. I can't believe she's gone.
Gone, gone, gone beyond. Gone completely beyond. Awakened. ~The Heart Sutra
Posted by Dawn at October 04, 2005 09:36 PM
Jay Allen ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.playapixie.org/nav-commenters.gif)
(jayallen.org) wrote:
I'm so sorry, honey. I know it's crushing and although I didn't know her, I feel like I know her through your words and stories.
Just remember, though, she is free. Free from the body which kept her spirit from soaring. She's gone, but always with you.
Posted on October 04, 2005 23:57 PST
my thoughts are with you, michael, dommie, nathan, the kids and all who loved her.
please know that i am holding you in my heart and wishing you the best in these wrenchingly transitional times you're experiencing.
Posted on October 05, 2005 09:11 PST
My heart goes out to Kim one more time, but certainly not the last. She faced the universe with so much courage it's almost unbelievable. I was always amazed how much fight was in her small body; when there was no fight left (something that none of us could have imagined) there was only courage.
My heart goes out to Nathan (who I've always known to be an amazing, fantastic and incredibly strong person) for all that he gave. My heart goes out to Shannon, who I barely know, but has been the best best friend a person could hope to have.
And my heart goes out to Dawn. Dawn, thank you for being so good to Kim and all of us during these times. Life is hard right now for all of us, but your love and compassion for Kim was more than just inspirational: It was and is a vital part of our community's soul. Thank you for lending Kim, Nathan, Shannon and, well, everyone your strength. This would have been much harder without you.
Thank you for doing her hair. That was beautiful.
Michael
PS, Yo, Kim: you fucking ROCK!
Posted on October 05, 2005 09:18 PST
I'm so sorry for your loss, but I'm glad to know it felt right to you in the moment.
Much love.
Posted on October 05, 2005 10:50 PST
Oh Dawn, I'm so sorry! The death of a friend is not easy, whether it's expected or sudden. I really feel for you. Just remember, "the heart is the only broken instrument that works" (T.E. Kalem).
(((((((( HUGS )))))))
Posted on October 05, 2005 11:56 PST
Oh darling I am so very sorry. It does seem that the Universe does like to pile things on, doesn't it?
Knowing that it is coming doesn't make it hurt any less, but also know that you being there made it better for Kim. I collected quotes after Mom died, and this one seems very appropriate to share for this: Unable are the Loved to die. For Love is Immortality. (Emily Dickinson)
Much love,
J.
Posted on October 06, 2005 10:36 PST
Playapixie
(playapixie.org) wrote:
Thanks, everyone, for your kind words and thoughts. Hard times, lately. It helps to have great friends like all of you.
I especially want to thank Nathan and Shannon for all their love and support of Kim. These two were the best possible friends to her. Words can not describe how grateful I am that they were there for Kim and what blessings they have been. It's rare in life to share the experience of death, and I think Nathan, Shannon, and I will forever be bonded as a result of it. I love you two. You are beautiful.
Posted on October 06, 2005 15:14 PST
I met Kim a few times, and in those times she has always rocked and how she knew she was going to die, but she just kept on shining. It is harder for Kalea, than it is for me. Kalea new Kim much, much longer than I have. She camped with her, and got to know her very well. Kim has done my hair once, and it was better than anywere else I have gone. But she is in a better place now. Her body had to stop fighting. We all love her, and Kim has left a part of her in our hearts. Love you Kim!
Posted on October 10, 2005 18:54 PST
You're a wonderful lady. I hope there is someone like you around to hold my hand when the time comes. And Kim was an extraordinary person...an example for all of us!!
Take care...
Posted on October 10, 2005 19:53 PST
Thank you Kim, for a job well done.
You may sleep now, and we will gently wake you when it is time to greet us, one by one, again.
We love you, we have always loved you, we will always love you.
Phil
Posted on October 15, 2005 12:53 PST
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Posted on October 16, 2005 07:19 PST
i have that very same shot you put on mirrorimage.com but on POLAROID!! what a great art car.
Posted on October 16, 2005 07:38 PST
Dawn, I just read about it, and my thoughts and players go for you and for your friend. Her writing is courageous, and I am thankful for the little bit that I got to see from her thoughts.
Posted on October 19, 2005 22:02 PST
Dawn, I am so sorry for your loss. I hope that being in Hawaii goes a long way toward comforting your heart.
Posted on October 25, 2005 08:51 PST
First, I'd like to apologize for bringing up a difficult memory.
Someone mentioned her name today and I couldn't stop thinking about her. I did some web searches and sadly found her blog coughingfit.org was down (I'll try and do some research on this and do what I can to assist in getting it back up).
Anyways.. I found this place.. and I really just wanted to give some positive vibes to Kim in her new journey and to family and friends who knew Kim - especially Nafun. I can't imagine how hard that was.
I've gathered a couple URLS including Kim's that went down and tossed it on my calendar to work on this week.
xoxo
Posted on March 15, 2008 19:45 PST
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